I’ve got a problem, and I think you might too.

I never ever hit my goals by the deadline I’ve set for them.

Whether it be work picking up, school bogging me down, travel, or just distraction and procrastination, the deadlines just always seem to pass with nothing to show for it.

Now, I’m not talking work goals or homework due dates. I’m talking about those personal goals that don’t have anyone but yourself involved.

Saving X amount of money, passing a license test you don’t technically need, even getting your weight to wherever you might want it. The ones where it’s all on you.

And for me? I’m chronically overdue on every single one of them.

What makes being late on these things even worse is they don’t just magically disappear when that due date arrives.

No sir, they stay with me, probably even more present in my head with each passing day that it’s late.

Now, it’s not like I’m just never knocking these things out. I definitely get to saving that amount of money saved or weighing the right amount of weight.

But it just feels like I’m never on schedule and whenever they become overdue, they start to cause stress to my life.

Goals are supposed to be exciting, not stressful.

Well, maybe a little stressful but they shouldn’t be causing me angst like an overdue homework assignment.

-Stuart Ritchie (Some guy on Linkedin)

My issue ultimately boils over during those days after I was supposed to complete the mission, but I think it stems from my approach I take when setting goals.

It’s the timeline for the goal that I have an issue with.

“By, say, September, I will do this.” September pulls up and sometimes I haven’t started. Now it’s just weighing on me while I tend to other new priorities.

I’m realizing that setting a timeframe just feels bound to cause more stress over time and it even sometimes discourages me whenever that day passes with nothing to show for it.

I think goals should be set as a progression, not a finality.

Instead of “by __, I’ll do this” it should be, “I’m currently here, ideally I’ll be here next, and then afterwards I’ll be there.”

This idea came to me because after chasing this since high school, I FINALLY weight about 185 pounds. lol.

Since high school I’ve been trying to weigh around that weight.

I was trying to play ball at the next level, and while attributes like weight were something that weren’t spoken about a ton, it was something I considered, and I knew the heavier I could be (to an extent) the more muscle and power I’d have for sports.

So, for the longest time that was the goal. 180-185 pounds.

Obviously, it’s been like more than half a decade since high school and I’m just now mentioning this so I definitely was overdue here.

But looking back, I honestly don’t think I’d have it any other way (and I handled the delay wayyyy better than I have with other goals).

Who knows the other paths I could’ve gone but working towards that goal developed some healthy habits and showed me not everything is linear.

At times, I’d weight 175. Others, 165. I even was 180 for a few months.

The journey was a roller coaster - we all know that image I shared above - and could you imagine if I treated it how I treat studying for this professional exam I gotta take??

(One of those goals I’m late for and it’s weighing on me. Not handling the delay as well haha).

For every day past the Monday I told myself I was going to start studying, I’m feeling the weight of studying more and more. But dude, 5 years of not weighing what I had attempted to weigh??? 

Lmfao, I’d have been miserable.

So, I think there’s some value here.

Not just for me, but for you too. Because we all beat ourselves up for being late to the game with something.

In treating goals as progressions (I’ll start at weighing 155, then I’ll weigh 165, then 175, then 185) and not adhering to strict deadlines for each, it frees us up to acknowledge and respect ourselves for trying.

We’re all adults here. In my eyes, we’re going to give the goals we truly want a good effort, and the ones we don’t care for as much less effort.

If you want it bad enough, you’ll work towards it. Trust your effort and know it’ll happen. There’s no need to add stress by getting it done within the month.

Again, we’ll give the effort. We’re all trying.

But we shouldn’t beat ourselves up if we’re still late. That does no good.

I’m at the point where I’m asking myself the question,

“So why even try to set an end date?”

I mean, yes, some end dates aren’t mine to move. But the ones I invented to fit my ideal timeline? Are they really necessary?

I like that image I shared alot. Sends a good message.

But that image above shows every goal starting and ending at the same time, and that’s where it’s lacking.

Not everything starts and ends at the same time for everyone.

Goals should be progressions - versions of your self in sequence towards an ultimate image.

When we set timelines, hardly anything good comes of it.

We’re going to achieve what we want one way or another so why add a timeframe that’s really just stress in disguise?

What goal of yours is “late” but doesn’t really have to be?

I hope you leave this five minutes a little lighter than when you started.

-Cal

P.S.

Were you able to win those 6 seconds these past few weeks? What helped you do so?

Reply to this email and let me know! Would love to see who else is turning into Saban here :)